new school year

Well okay. It's a new year at school. The boys are all safely in class. Here is something that bugs me. The school bus system excludes high school kids who live within 3 miles. I could pay to have him ride the bus but that's only if they have room. Hello. In a "city" (and I'm using that term loosely) where the snow sometimes gets three feet deep, as a result of the temperatures which do get below freezing, and having heard all about the greenhouse ozone environmental problems, human beings may or my not believe in the attempt to lower emissions by using public transportation, why then are we going to be this way? So we now have to drive, at least in the mornings. In the afternoons, I'm more than happy for him to walk home unless we're having a snow storm. Even if we live a few blocks away from everything else, it is just too cold in the winter and he is just too "cool" (another term I'm using loosely) to wear proper winter clothing.  I was counting on the bus so I could walk the little two to school, walk myself to class, and the kid who lives 2.5 miles from school would ride the bus in the snow. I know it is only 2-3 days a week. But still. That low-carbon-footprint was sort of a plus to being too poor to buy gas. Ugh. I am too poor to have children...I suspected it from the very minute I read that on Facebook, people I know are posting "If you can't afford to feed your children then quit having them!" (Well if I knew I was going to be poor, do you really think I would have had three children? And on second thought, if you're too rude to avoid liking such thoughtlessly hateful things, then why are you my friend anyway?) I hate being confronted with the reality of my situation. It brings up huge amounts of doubt. Am I doing the right thing by going back to school instead of just working at the closest McBurgerJoint? Of course. Am I a drain on society? Probably...or at least it is a very fine balancing act. Do I really need internet access? Well I can care for my children at home while I'm doing homework instead of having to do it at the public library for 45 minute time limits...although I'm sure the librarians would be delighted to see my kids so often. Am I going to be teaching these people's children some day? Probably. Will I hold it against them that their parents were so shallow? No. Does it make me want to crawl back in bed to think that people who supposedly want the world to be a better place really have no place in their hearts for the less fortunate? Yes. Am I secretly glad people don't know I'm the person they're talking about when they're so righteously spewing put-downs for welfare mothers? Yes.