resolutions

Everyone has resolutions even if they don't want to admit it. I have a few I've thought up. For example:
  #1
Lose 40 lbs before I turn 40 

That's a big one. Totally do-able.

#2
Wear my Jimmy Choo super awesome patent leather pumps more often.

Or ever, in my case. I am sure I have worn them once. Well twice or three times but only once in public. This might be painful but I have heard the pain is worth it, right? I mean eventually my toes will get used to it, from what I've heard. All that squeezing and dislocated numb feeling?
Maybe my resolution should be more like, finding a shoe insert to avoid that feeling.
Um. Move into a house.With a garage. A big garage.
Exercise more.
Fit into skinny jeans. Or jeggings, because my friend thinks they're cool. 
Work more.
Get an actual full time teaching job. That I enjoy.
See my sisters and other relatives more often.
Read more books (because last year I only read like, I dunno, 53 books maybe) and that should always be on a list.
Not yell at my children as much and just make them wash the toilet instead. Except when they (he) "butt dials" 911 on the land line ... well that's the claim anyway. He sat on it.
Get more sleep.